I woke up at six something to a wailing, fussy baby who was quickly pacified by nursing. I 'nipped' that one in the bud rather quickly. Hopefully she will have a good day, but my little stinker seems cranky...is today going to be one of those days? I should really just be thankful she sleeps through the night.
I wander into the kitchen only to find that one of my dogs was really pissed off at me, so he spitefully pooped on our Brazillian cowhide rug. Wow! That'll be the last time I baby gate him off from us. I'm trying to find some way to turn this situation into some kind of non-negative thought. However, this is annoying and also disgusting, so it's a toughie!
I'm cleaning up and then my husband comes home at 7 something, pretty exhausted from a 24 hour shift at the fire station. He's tired from working a fire from 2 am til 4 am and needs to sleep. No help here, but I understand. Just be thankful he made it home...thank you, Lord, for bringing my husband home to me.
I feel the anxiety and stress flowing through my body and hovering over me like a rain cloud. Rain... Like the tons we have had lately that have made my back yard looking like a lake. Be thankful for rain and glad we aren't going through a drought, I tell myself.
So I dart out to the local laundry mat to use their industrial sized washer and dryer to handle cleaning the rug.
Then it's off to the doctor for my weekly allergy shot so I can one day breathe while playing outside.
At some point, I'll need to work. I have things to do, people to see, reports to submit, a house to clean, laundry to do, etc. Gotta eat some time in between too...and eat healthy at that, so I can lose these pesky 10 lbs that are really lurking and refuse to go away. Irritation. Frustration.
All the while, I'm taking 10 deep breaths, which I am now calling rescue breaths, to combat the tendency for my day to go south, go sour, or turn into a bad day, a MONDAY! I'm deeply breathing in slowly through my nose and out through my mouth to rescue myself from a meltdown.
Every. Single. Day...It seems like! I'm constantly taking 10 breaths over and over...Because I don't have time to make it to yoga every day.
I'm going through this life wishing I had it all together, pretending that I do. Maybe I can trick myself into believing that I'm highly organized and knowledge. Ha!
During these deep breaths, initially I think of how bad certain situations are, how people suck, and how overwhelming and busy life can be. I think of how badly I want change...a better attitude, a less busy life, a bigger house, less bills to pay, etc. Then, as I'm breathing, I think of the bigger picture. I keep telling myself to be thankful. I start to calm down. I think of how grateful I should be that I have a job to do, a home to live in and care for, an angelic daughter to love, an amazing husband to go through this life with, and dogs to bring joy to our lives. Not everyone has these things.
These things aren't guarantees. They are blessings. I really do have the tendency to let things allow me to quickly become negative, and disturb the peace and joy of my day.
I then stop and think of how there are people out there in really bad situations. There are lots of people facing illness and even death. These are big things. Dog poop on a rug doesn't seem significant anymore.
My Mom's friend was recently put on hospice. She's expected to live 1 week. Mom will go visit her in a few days to say her final good byes. How hard is that? And how sad...She will lose her battle with cancer all too soon. But this woman has a great attitude. I need to have a great attitude. Also, My Best friend's mom has been in the hospital since last Wednesday with a very rare and severe cranial spine bacterial infection attacking her bone, all because of some pork she ate while vacationing in Mexico. This is truly awful. She's not doing well. These are BIG things. These are serious things. Everything else is petty.
I'm a highly emotional and sensitive person. Moody too. But I have no excuse NOT to have a great attitude. I have my health. While I may have a mildly uncomfortable case of Dequariveins and some wrist bone bruising, I'll make it. Be thankful, I tell myself. Take your 10 deep breaths. Keep doing it. I don't have a simple, easy, always blissful life, but I have everything I need and most of what I want. I am blessed and I'll make it through one stressful day after another. But I need to enjoy each day in this life. Really enjoy all the moments, instead of letting them stress me out!
I won't get home til late tonight. I'll have to work at our gym after work. I will finally get home from my day after 7 PM, I'll have to do dinner, clean up, shower, put Gracie to bed and then finally, I'll go to sleep myself. I'll say my prayers and I will take 10 rescue breaths again. I will thank God for all the blessings he's given me this day. And I will hope to wake in the morning. But there's no promise for tomorrow, so I should really keep trying every day to be positive, handle the curve balls as they're thrown, try to thoroughly enjoy each day that I've been given, not sweat the small stuff and be thankful.
We all should. Just remember to breathe!
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